Thursday, July 14, 2016

Your "Invite "Is Showing And Other Bullshit

(Side note: )

This picture makes me giggle as the guy is actually looking at her...wait for it.....FACE. YES! ;p)

I have a 70 year old friend who I go skiing with. (she amazingly, snowboards) She regularly kicks my ass as she flies down the slopes.

We rollerblade these days as it’s warmer (I am sitting here with a sunburn as we speak.)
She amazes me, the longevity she has, and how long she can stay on those damn skates gliding along as I huff and puff and don’t blow her house down haha. (she took my skates to her house to check the wheels last week, said they don’t spin right so I have an excuse, maybe I don’t feel so bad, but again, she’ll still hit meh' where the Lord split meh. (Translated- she’ll still kick my ass...)

Last week I met her at the pool, as I usually do, at a club I frequent. I wore a two piece swimming suit, the top part of a “tank” suit with a split half way down to my stomach.

The minute I saw her, she looked straight at my swimming suit and said “Your invite is showing.”
(To be fair, when I told her what she said had offended me, she said her daughter said that- but where did her daughter learn it? Children learn it from parents, and grandparents- it’s been happening for generations, and it will TAKE generations to undo it.)

I said “they're just boobs. It has nothing to do with an invite.”

Why do we as women do this to each other? Do we believe we are “protecting” each other this way? Are we standing up for each other as women, or shaming each other and not protecting each other at all?

Why are we stigmatizing men this way? WHY are we treating them as if they are nothing but animals?

We have to hold men to a higher standard. (For more on that, go to Jackson Katz’s amazing ted talk here- he is helping to change roles- if every man, and I dare say woman would be more like him, this wouldn’t be a problem)

It’s comments like “your “invite” is showing” that excuse men of rape, incest and murder.

How much fabric or how little fabric a woman is wearing should NOT decide her worth, or if she’s a “slut” or not.

Women should own their bodies THEMSELVES, not let someone else decide for them, or worse yet, be shamed for them.

There are places Europe, women run around without tops on. Bottoms even. This is not a big thing.

In America where we are supposedly the "world leader" (I say this tongue in cheek, BIG time) we are such prudes. We shame ourselves as women here and allow men to excuse themselves for brutish behavior. Saying men are just like that. It is inexcusable. On both counts.

I keep telling myself I need to move overseas. There has got to be somewhere where it is better than this. I am so exasperated and frustrated by comments that judge me (and other women) as if before anything women "HAVE" to prove that they aren't sluts out to land a man. Aren't we aloud to be comfortable by ourselves? Why is it automatically assumed we have a motive???

Now If I were on a deserted island by myself alone, I WOULD run around naked. Its honestly more comfortable. Heaven forbid I feel the sun on my skin, everywhere.How cool would that be? Does this make me a slut? Or am I asking for a serious sunburn? (Maybe, haha) But the rebel in me loves the thought.

Which makes me think of a goofy Dharma and Greg show where she dances naked to welcome spring(A welcome respite from my rant haha)

I read a story the other day about a girl who refused to wear a bra to school. Though she was covered, she was brought out of class. May I ask who was shamed and whose day was really interrupted? Oh, I know the answer to that one. HERS was. Who was looking so hard at her chest anyway? The women there fell behind her and went braless at her school because whose body is it anyway? Yes, its HERS..

And while we’re at much fabric a woman is wearing (Or if she is wearing a bra or not) has nothing to do with a man taking "it" out of his pants and forcing it on someone that doesn't want it. Whether shes wearing a berka, full dress, bra or braless. She is not asking for it. That is HIS action, not hers, If hes thinking "shes asking for it".. hes suspect and if he acts on it he's criminal.

Who are we to decide who's fucking asking for it???

Do you want to ask the person if shes asking for it. No? Then fucking go away.

Yes I'm angry. I'm sick of dealing with this ridiculous mindset.

We need to teach our men better. From the cradle to the grave.

Everything else is bullshit.


  1. As usual great post. I have two comments though. 1. Calling for respect for women's bodies, then calling the male part "junk" seems a bit contrary. We need to show respect too. 2.Just curious, do you think it also fine for guys to go around naked? They do have the difference of having there sexual moods announced by visible changes. Naked tops aren't a big deal, but I want the parts that sit on a toilet covered. Especially if I'm going to be sitting on the same chair latter.

  2. You do have a point about me calling it mans junk...perhaps something for me to learn there. maybe I'll go look up something more complimentary:P Thanks for bringing up that point. I think I was thinking of the term "unk n the trunk" and now that I think of it, that doesn't bring up anything complimentary either if its literal. I think whoever named body parts is silly- Penis means tail in latin and vagina means sheath...looking up why they are named the way they are has some hilarious articles from different names for a vi-jj and articles with stars from Lady Gaga to Brittney Spears making faces with different names for genitilla above their face. My favorite name for vagina is "Love Taco." HAHAHA! Looking up " funny but respectable names for penis got (more than once) my laugh out loud award for the day. The one that got my vote was, er...Mr. Happy. (well, they are all seriously masculine but icky and most maybe not too worth repeating, even though they made me laugh) The other part, well hey,if a person carries a towel or something to sit on,no problem! ;p (I carry a towel into the sauna at the Y- specifically for that problem. Cause women are going to run around there naked anyway and sit their butts down on the wood there. I suppose that could be taken badly too. (Uh oh...;p) I suppose there could be a naughty joke in there somewhere.:p

  3. Ug...putting "Mr Happy" in there just doesn't fit with the vibe. Lol all the other names are funny as hell, but perverted.

  4. Oh, and I didn't answer your question about guys, yes I think its ok for them to walk around naked. I don't know about you, but I think guys aren't as afraid as women are to do it. It reminds me of a Ted Talk where a woman said the first time she was shamed was when she and her young friends were naked under the stars (nothing sexual- just felt good to be naked lying in the grass)next thing she knows, there was yelling at her from the house to come in and get dressed- she sais it was the first time she was shamed in such a way- though the guys stayed outside naked while she went in and was forced to get dressed.) I think its an interesting but sad contrast. What women are "aloud" to do vs men.

    1. Personally I like the picture and the fact that he's looking at her face. That shows that he knows her well and has respect :-)